Everyone's talking about eldest daughters—but your oldest son, younger daughter, and youngest son are navigating their own invisible pressures based on birth order and gender. Here's what parents miss about how patriarchy, biology, and family dynamics shape each child differently (and why it matters for their adult relationships, work, and mental health).

We think we’re shaping each child individually, and that’s not totally wrong. But behind the scenes, siblings are shaping each other. From motivation  to confidence to long-term self-concept, sibling dynamics influence who kids believe they’re allowed to be. And most of are missing the important role they play.